Right, so Im adopted (no not by Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, though statistically they were the most likely people to) and over my 20 or so years i’ve come across a range of questions and misconceptions about what exactly it means so figured id make a post about it just to break the ice and clear some shit up.
First of all, i’ve always known i was adopted, admittedly this isn’t always the case but for me and most the people i’ve met who were adopted, it ain’t a thing. the black kid in a white family trope is not the standard.
which actually leads me on to my next point, i’ve literally never seen an accurate portrayal of adoption in TV or Film, if you think you know any good examples hit me up. Tracey Beaker ain’t shit and the awkward family gathering where you find out your adopted also doesn’t happen usually.
Next up, when i say mum and dad i mean the parents who adopted and raised me, they aren’t step parents. To me, Parents are those that brought you up and guided you through your life. Family isn’t defined by blood, least not to me. this one is a big one and i think important to people who have thought about adopting one day. i do not with a single fibre in my body have any hate at all towards my parents. i’ve told before by people “oh id wanna adopt but i don’t want my kid to hate me” look okay, i wont tell you its easy to adopt or to take on someone else child, most of have been through hell an back before we adopted trust me and yes it may be difficult at first but understand this… you’re giving that child a second chance, a do over, a better path and they will grow up with that at their core, its at my core, my whole life is a second chance given to me. I struggle in my own ways to justify it sometimes but hell i cant change it and i’m thankful for it every single day. think about that when you worry, its not a small thing you are doing, you are literally changing someones world and their path in life is better for it. So if you have it in your heart to do it, absolutely do it. Not even gonna lie to you Im welling up as i write this, thats how much it means.
If you don’t choose to adopt later in life which most of you wont, promise one thing please, teach your kids that adoption and adopted children are as valid as any others because the reason i’m so happy to talk about this subject and am so open about it is because of earlier parts of my life where i was bullied for it, i’m not gonna go into detail about it but i don’t really think it was malicious at all. To me it came near exclusively from not understanding about what it means and such. this is backed up by the completely different reaction i get now where people ask questions or say they know someone else who’s adopted too. i live for that because i am happy to answer any questions at all and if you read this and wonder anything, hit me up.
Thanks again for reading all of you x
Through The Eyes Of Paul 